In the blink of an eye

Rachel Adamson, Editor in Chief

Goodbyes make a person think. They make them realize what was had, what is lost and what was taken for granted.

According to Disabled World, 1 in 7 Americans lose a sibling
or a parent before the age of 20. Seniors Trey Brummett, Amanda Kluth and McKinnon Madden are an example of this statistic.

Brummett’s father died three years ago from liver cancer. Kluth’s father died three years ago from pancreatic cancer. Madden’s sister died of a seizure in her sleep due to epilepsy two years ago, she was 18.

“I saw two guys pick him up out of his bed and put him into a body bag,” Brummett said.

Madden’s sister died unexpectedly over night.

“The night before the incident, we hung out and watched Tarzan,” Madden said.

The emotional trauma caused anger, confusion, disbelief, grief and self-blame.

According to Dr. Lisa Bischoff [school psychologist] it is natural to question the death of a loved one.

“I have the room right across the hall from her, so I always slept with door open. I always woke up when she had seizures, but not this time. Why didn’t I wake
up? If I would have woke up she would still be here,” Madden said.

At first Brummett could not handle his emotions and began to contemplate suicide.

Bischoff said it is normal for the teens to have suicidal thoughts while grieving a loved one because they are already thinking about death.

“I had a gun and the bullets in my hand and I was sitting there in my bed. After about an hour, I decided it wasn’t worth it because I would go to hell and never see my dad again,” Brummett said.

If you have a friend who has just lost a loved one, the best thing to do is just be there for them.

“When you have a friend that is grieving, be open and not judgmental. If they want to go shopping, then you go shopping with them,” Bischoff said.

Kluth would have to agree with this, as somebody being there for her was just what she needed.

“My brother helped me get through it, he was like my backbone. He was always there for me, willing to talk about anything,” Kluth said.

However, if your friend is ever considering self-harm,it is important to get them professional help. If you are the one grieving, according to Bischoff, there is no right or wrong way to deal with grief. The best thing to do is to be with someone.

“My friends helped me the most, they were always there. I had always had those days when it just got to me and they would listen to me ramble on,” Madden said.

An event like this makes you question who you are and where you fit in. It also changes the way you look at life itself.

“I now put in perspective how I treat others because they could be gone before I know it,” Kluth said.

Since their loved ones passed away, they never quite got over it. They just slowly learned how to go on without them but always keeping them tucked safely away in their hearts.

“I like to remember what he looked like and who he was because I strive to be more like him, I will never forget that,” Brummett said.

While the losses of their loved ones left them broken and confused, the teens still saw beyond the sorrow.

“I find it comforting to know that she doesn’t have seizures anymore,” Madden said.

When someone becomes a memory, those memories of that person become treasures.

“I miss when he use to pick me up for a hug and spin me around,” Brummett said.

“We’d stay up late listening to music and he’d play the guitar for me… I miss that,” Kluth said.

“I miss her presence; she was the only person I had to talk to,” Madden said.

When a loved one dies it feels like drowning in a pool of emotions. Yet, it is important to surface and face the world. The grieving never stops, but it gets easier as time goes on.